What is wrong with you? What is wrong with me?

What is wrong with me? A question I have replayed in my head over a thousand times. "What is wrong with you? What's going on?" Questions that have been directed at me hundreds of times, when I'm quiet, subdued by the goings on of life and trying to survive life with (several) mental health issues.... Continue Reading →

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What’s Happening?

It seems like ages ago that I managed to write up a blog post. Back before I had a full time job there was plenty of time to dedicate to writing this blog. More than enough time to think up new ideas, right at the beginning I could even write two posts a week! Now... Continue Reading →

Change

You may have been asking "Has NewGreenShoots stopped blogging?" Nope. I have just been adjusting to life as a full time worker. Four weeks ago  I begun my very first full time job! At the grand old age of 27. It all started really well, surprising myself and my family by not being majorly tired... Continue Reading →

The pain is constant

Have you ever experienced pain that starts in your hands, a tingling sensation that grows, creeping up your arms to your heart, clasping it almost as though it's become hands that are squeezing it so tight? The pain is so bad that even though you want to cry and scream, nothing comes out? Your eyes... Continue Reading →

I am….who, without an ED?

An eating disorder, or any type of mental illness gives a person an identity. Despite it being one we certainly do not want. Like a job: "Hi, I'm an engineer" `I am Anorexic." As much as I have tried to separate my identity from that of the eating disorder, it has become part of me... Continue Reading →

The time to think

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to read minds? Is that what would be your choice of superpower? I used to think it would be great to read minds, to find out what the people around me genuinely thought of me. Did the guy I like, fancy me back? Did those girls... Continue Reading →

Body Confidence

I've written about confidence on here before, being confident going out to meet friends, confidence in your general abilities etc. However body confidence, which is currently such a big talking point in the media, is a tough enough subject for someone who doesn't have an eating disorder (whether that be anorexia, bulimia or binge-eating) let... Continue Reading →

It’s the constant circle

My 'ED' friends and I, those of us who have either been inpatient or know others that have, describe admissions as 'revolving doors.'  Patients go in, get fed, reach a set BMI and are sent home. Except in the case of Cygnet, where some patients have been in their care for 6 years. After patients... Continue Reading →

How do you do it?

This week I began therapy again. After having had such a bad few days/week with my mental health, my family decided enough was enough. I/we had to take action and get me back into therapy, I needed someone professional to speak to. And after trying and failing to make contact with my NHS team, private... Continue Reading →

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